Loving and losing. It happens to everybody who is a loser. So I don't really know what it feels like. In fact, I don't know what either emotion feels like. But that doesn't prevent me from understanding the concept. And I have a problem with the analogy we've been using to describe the love/loss situation.
"It's okay, there are other fish in the sea."
Yeah, maybe that analogy is appropriate for the backwoods rednecks who are unaware of anything more important than fishing, but the comparison sucks. One, it's dehumanizing. Comparing men and women to fish. Tiny-brained, gaping mouthed, smelly morons–that only sounds like women to me.
Two, fishing involves tricking a less intelligent fish into biting your hook before you yank it around violently then pull it in and "catch" it. Fishing is based on deception, lies, and violence. Okay, I guess that sounds a lot like the way people I know have fallen in "love," but I still disagree with the comparison.
"There are other fish in the sea." Uh, no. The only other fish in the sea are the one's that people tossed back because they weren't good enough to mount as a trophy on their wall, probably in the kitchen where all trophy wives end up. They're good looking for a reason, and it's not because they are intelligent and pursuing a serious career.
With all that being said, I've taken it upon myself to come up with better and more appropriate analogies for the so, so sad scenario of love and subsequently, the loss of that love.
"It's okay, there are other viral maladies that affect the human immune system."
"There are other bears in the woods."
"There are other stars in the Universe."
"There are other channels that might have something good on."
"There are other things on Facebook you can 'like.'"
"There are other circuses that will come through town."
"There are more shitty Michael Bay movies."
"There will be more waves to ride."
"There are other blogs by Matt that you might like."
Finally, in an attempt to reach out to the people who read this blog? Are there? I'm asking you to submit your own analogies in the comments section. I'll even change the name of the section from "Things stupid people said," to something less offending.
Let's see what other ways we can compare complex human emotions to something extremely simple. And don't even get me started on "All's fair in love and war." Uh, the Geneva Convention.
